The Most Profound Question To Ask Yourself

The Most Profound Question To Ask Yourself

by | Feb 1, 2026 | Self Development

What Can I Give Myself That No One Else Did?

There’s been an energetic theme this year that has delivered a spiritual and radical transformative change. Did you experience all the feels?

I know, it’s felt big throughout the entire 2025. Wave after wave of shifting vibrational space, drama and old krud surfacing.

I’ve likened those heavy sensations to being bumped around inside a washing machine. It was not comfortable, and I know I’m not alone. My clinical clients have been telling me they have been feeling it too.

There’s something significant I share with clients to bridge the gap between clinical appointments. This is your invitation to journal.

I recognise there are times when it feels overwhelming to sit and feel the sensations of unexpressed emotions. It can, therefore, feel impossible to speak about what you’re feeling. Sometimes there are no words, but the sensations remain.

When this heaviness resides within, journaling can allow your body to express what you’ve been holding onto. It’s a fabulous form of expression to stop those thoughts swirling around your everyday mind.

There can be occasions when you open your journal, and the intensity of

If you deserve to feel pain, you deserve to unpack it. It’s that simple. Life is meant to be lived, not just survived.

When you’re always in survival mode, there’s no space for growth, evolution or recalibration. When you’re in a state of survival, there is zero space or capacity for healing.

What if I could permit you to look at your pain in a different way?

What part of you hasn’t healed because you’ve been too busy surviving to get to tomorrow?

I was physically and emotionally challenged last year. I found myself journaling one day to gain self-awareness about the situation.

So when life hits you a good one, upside of the head, if you don’t cry or don’t do something different, your reactive response is to unconsciously seek a way forward.

You haven’t dealt with the life slap, you have just reacted to it.

So here’s your permission to acknowledge the slaps and parts of you that haven’t healed. It’s time to process and learn so that when tomorrow arrives, you will have naturally evolved and recalibrated change within your nervous system.

Here’s your permission to parent yourself.

I wonder where you might start the healing process?

Will you give yourself permission to soften?

Permission to be vulnerable? To cry? To feel?

Will you permit yourself to sit in the sensations until they pass?

Could you write about that, as if writing a love letter to your inner self holding the wounds?

I wonder what that part that has been trying to survive all these years needs to feel safe? I wonder what it feels like to release the need to survive? Write the answer in your journal.

This is what you then discuss in therapy.

This is how you bridge the gaps between therapeutic sessions with your practitioner.

This is how you dig deep.

This is how you heal.

So what might stop you from leaning into the answer of the question — what did I need, but never got?

Then ask yourself the most profound question of all — Can I now give this to myself?

Conclusion

Asking simple yet profound questions builds a relationship with yourself. Be prepared to be surprised at how simple the answers might be as you gift yourself the missing links!

Want to read more like this?

This is My Roar – signed copies of my first published book can be purchased from this website.

Self Reflection – A little Look Within – click here

8 Hot Tips How To Journal – click here

Can You Risk Not Stepping Up To Mother yourself? – Click here

About Karen

Change Facilitator

Karen Humphries is a Behavioural Change Facilitator — Mental Health Counsellor, Kinesiology Practitioner + Business Mentor, Intuitive Meditation Facilitator, Clinical Hypnotherapist, Wellness Coach, and Clinical Resource Therapist. She is a published author. She is a self-confessed laughaholic and loves being of service to the world with her humorous and positive approach to life, encouraging people to ‘choose to change and bloom from within.’

Karen Humphries, Change Chick, Change Facilitator, Kinesiology, Wellness Coach, Australian Bush Flower Essences, LEAP Facilitator, Trauma, Public Speaker, Cancer Ambassador, Blooming From Within, Traralgon, Victoria, Gippsland

I feel like I’ve tried everything

I feel like I’ve tried everything

by | Oct 21, 2025 | Self Development

Is this statement the biggest miss?

Whenever I hear a client tell me that they perceive they “have tried everything”, I know they’ve missed the most obvious thing. In fact, I wish I had a dollar for every single time I heard this phrase about someone on their healing journey.

Clients often boast of the list of things they’ve done to resolve their issue. They’ve set goals, created vision boards, put reminders in their phones, changed their routines, sampled every single diet known to mankind, taken expensive supplements and tried various therapies.

Their lists are expansive and exhaustive.

After twenty years of running a therapeutic space, I have one thing that my clients haven’t tried — reviewing their perception of themselves. Your self-image is critical to any change process.

So often, we look outside of ourselves to problem-solve something that is actually an internal issue. Your thoughts, feelings, and subsequent behaviours come from within you — these emotional aspects are a part of you.

You can’t cut that part out of you, nor can you stop it by pushing a button, taking a tablet or drinking a potion. You can however, learn to accept and hopefully love these emotional parts of yourself.

I ask clients (who have ‘tried everything’), what their worst perception is of themselves — I am treated with a stunned look or blank face. Sometimes I wish I had a camera to capture their reaction, because it’s so dramatic.

If the person is brave enough, they will admit their negative self-beliefs. These deep and dark confessions sound like –

  • not good enough
  • hopeless
  • unworthy

It’s word vomit like this that dissolved your positive foundation. I use the metaphor “think of your body as a house”. When you have strong positive beliefs, the foundation of your house is solid and grounded. But when you experience thoughts and feelings that are negative, you’ve got termites.

Negative self-beliefs eat away at your confidence —using the metaphor, negativity destabilises your walls and roof, letting in the outside weather. Imagine looking at a termite-infested house, with rotting walls and holes in the roof.

Go on, imagine that right now.

Imagine trying to relax or get warm during a storm, with the rain and wind gusting through all those holes. Imagine how uncomfortable you’d become.

This is what happens to your body when your belief in self becomes negative. When you continue with negative self-beliefs you erode your inner world-

  • your outlook on life
  • your willingness
  • your motivation
  • your boundaries (especially with how you allow others to treat you)
  • how you show up to the world

To stabilise your emotional foundations, I use a combination of modalities and tools to support my clients in defusing the negative emotional energy associated with their lowered self-belief.

Try my H.E.A.L. method – Four simple steps to guide you inwards and find your solution for healing

 My H.E.A.L. Method is a simplistic approach designed to guide individuals through their healing process that is both intuitive and effective. By following these four steps, you can facilitate your own personal growth to restore positive belief in self.

STEP ONE — H: Hear

The first step is to hear what you are saying. This involves listening deeply to the language you use about yourself. 

Emotional negativity is comprised of thoughts, feelings and behaviours (because they can’t be separated). There is power of choice when you explore what you are feeling, what you think when you feel those thoughts, and what your resultant behaviour becomes.

Your ability to ‘hear’ gives you a conscious awareness of your triggers.

STEP TWO — E: Evaluate

So you’ve started listening attentively. Your next step is to evaluate the emotion you become aware of. This will often be associated with those thoughts and feelings you’ve become stuck within. Gentle exploration of what activates your old pattern of negativity invites you to make different choices of what you may need to accept and even release.

Evaluating your own signals from your body and mind can be empowering. You’ll very quickly be able to identify people, places or situations that push all your buttons and cause the negative flag to fly.

It’s critical during this phase to be really kind to yourself — because we all have experiences of big feelings, patterns, triggers, and areas that need attention. 

STEP THREE — A: Adjust

Once you have gained a clear understanding of what and how your negative self-belief likes to dance, it’s time to adjust. You can choose to make a myriad of changes to your lifestyle, mindset, or environment that support your healing journey. 

The best part of this step is giving yourself permission to pause once you’ve recognised your old pattern has been reactivated, and make a choice to change. This could involve setting boundaries, adopting new habits, or seeking support from professionals.

When you work with me, know that we don’t knock down your walls, we don’t destroy, we explore and adjust. We use kindness to repair and rejuvenate your nervous system so it feels safe to make those adjustments.

Sometimes you install windows within your walls, unlock doors, or install a ladder to climb over the obstacles you’ve built yourself.  At each session we renovate your house to allow more light to shine from within, and for you to access your true inner essence. This is high vibration at work.

STEP FOUR — L: Liberate

The final step is to liberate yourself from the constraints of past pains and patterns. Embrace the freedom that comes from hearing, evaluating and adjusting to achieve your desired healing outcome. 

Liberation from old negativity incorporates celebrating all progress (no matter how small the step is) and continuing to nurture your well-being. What could be better to create meaningful change in your life than to maintain this new, healthy emotional state to balance your life?

Liberation often comes via homework, which gives you the opportunity to reconnect to the path that shines your light, over and over until it becomes subconscious muscle memory.

Conclusion

Following the H.E.A.L. Method is a process. You drive the speed at which you progress and create meaningful change in your life. By implementing the H.E.A.L steps, individuals can embark on a transformative journey towards healing and personal development.

About Karen

Change Facilitator

Karen Humphries is a Mental Health Counsellor, Kinesiology Practitioner + Accredited Business Mentor, Wellbeing Coach, Meditation Facilitator,  Hypnotherapist, and Resource Therapist. Karen is also a published author. She is a self-confessed laughaholic.  She loves being of service to the world with her humorous and positive approach to life, encouraging people to ‘choose to change and bloom from within.’ 

Karen Humphries, Change Chick, Change Facilitator, Kinesiology, Wellness Coach, Australian Bush Flower Essences, LEAP Facilitator, Trauma, Public Speaker, Cancer Ambassador, Blooming From Within, Traralgon, Victoria, Gippsland

Change Your Misperception Of The Outside World

Change Your Misperception Of The Outside World

by | Jul 12, 2024 | Self Development

5 Coaching Questions To Ask Yourself Daily To Transform Your Life

When clients first walk through my door, my first question is always something along the lines of “What brings you here today?”. The answer lately has been very consistent — “I’m feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or stuck”.

During a therapeutic session, we unpack the root cause of those big feelings, and we wrap up with big sighs of relief. Clients are frequently prescribed homework interventions with the view of creating new positive infused habits.

Once you get home, rather than deep dive down into a rabbit hole, and potentially reactivate a trauma experience’s reaction, we can utilise a circuit breaker to simply interrupt that old, uncomfortable program called survival. You know what I’m talking about, those behaviours of negative based thoughts, feelings and self-sabotaging actions that leave you feeling like crap.

Sometimes, the best way to create change habits in your life is to pause and take a breath. My clients often report they feel a little lost as to what to do next. I always suggest they ask themselves a circuit breaker question to interrupt the negative neurological pattern(s) of survival.

In my experience, it’s so useful to ask yourself these simple coaching questions because it forces your brain to switch off the survival program and return to solution-orientated thinking.

Try these self-exploration questions yourself today

Ask as a singular question or as a combination.

Question 1 — Does this align with the life I want to create?

This question is designed to reconnect and focus on the goals associated with your dream life. By questioning your current status quo, you can discern whether you are still aligned with your true north.

Question 2 — What would the best version of me do?

This question enables you to step out of a drama dance, whether it be yours or that of another. Quite simply turn off the tantrum and get on with having the life experience, learning the lesson and frankly getting on with it.

Question 3 — Does this compromise the energy I want to operate?

So often we get caught up in the humanness of our experiences, and so easily get caught up in the old reactive story of life. When you are reactive or defensive, all of your energies (physical, mental and emotional) are directed towards keeping you primed to fight or take flight. 

When you’re in this mindset, there’s no capacity for solution-based thinking or doing. Therefore, asking yourself this question enables you to recognise exactly what and how much energy you are investing to maintain the survival status quo.

Question 4 — Am I chasing this for myself or others?

Don’t get me wrong, you’re allowed to be of service to others. But the age-old saying “You can’t pour from an empty cup” always rings true. If you use all your energy for your service, how do you continue saving, helping, and servicing without burning yourself out?

This question is also a gentle method to become curious as to why you’re invested in an action. Step back and ask yourself this question enables you to identify whether support (especially if over time) is still appropriate or even safe for you to continue.

Question 5 — Will my future self, thank me for this?

This question can be used to reinforce the desire and need to step back and simply observe what is happening outside of you. It’s only then that you can fully consciously recognise that this isn’t your stuff.

Conclusion

If you’re ready to tackle your sense of foreboding overwhelm, anxiety or sensation of feeling stuck, try these coaching questions today, and change the way you perceive your external reality.

Listen to the audio version via the “I Am Change-ing” Podcast – click here

First published with Illumination, a Medium Publication. Click here this piece.

Want to read more like this?

This is My Roar – signed copies of my first published book can be purchased from this website.

Self Reflection – A little Look Within – click here

8 Hot Tips How To Journal – click here

Can You Risk Not Stepping Up To Mother yourself? – Click here

About Karen

Change Facilitator

Karen Humphries is a Kinesiology Practitioner, Health & Business Coach, LEAP & NES Practitioner, Intuitive Meditation Facilitator, and published author. She is a self-confessed laughaholic.  She loves being of service to the world with her humorous and positive approach to life, encouraging people to ‘choose to change and bloom from within.’ 

Karen Humphries, Change Chick, Change Facilitator, Kinesiology, Wellness Coach, Australian Bush Flower Essences, LEAP Facilitator, Trauma, Public Speaker, Cancer Ambassador, Blooming From Within, Traralgon, Victoria, Gippsland