The Beatles Had It Right

The Beatles Had It Right

Love Is Every Thing

Something’s different within our society since COVID. Conversations don’t flow like they once did, until we’re behind closed doors. We’ve lost connection to our universal language — love.

Love is more than a feeling

Love is more than an emotion or mental state. I think it’s safe to say that it transcends sensation, as well as cultures, and even time. Love is a glue that can bind us together in times of hardship.

Love can be the unspoken driving force that propels us forward into the future and into the unknown. Love is what propels us through uncertainty and fear.

When I work with younger people, they describe love as that heart-fluttering excitement of a first crush. The more mature generations often describe love as a profound connection that has become entwined within a lifelong partnership.

Love enriches our lives in countless ways. Just ask anyone who owns a Labrador. These four-legged fur balls only know how to love you; there’s not much else beyond the desire to always eat or have you pat them. Our pets love us unconditionally, even grumpy cats.

As a therapist and mature menopausal woman, I’ve experienced firsthand how vital love actually is for our life force. Love is as vital as clean air, sleep and nutritious food. But I’m not talking about the love from others. I’m referencing your capacity and willingness to love yourself.

It’s my belief that the most important love of all is the one we often (and so easily) overlook — love for ourselves.

In this blog, let’s explore why self-love is everything, sprinkled with humor, positive affirmations, and practical tips.

Why Should You Love Yourself?

When working with trauma clients, or long term depression/anxiety clients, I will explain the need for love. I make references and connections of how self love can support an individual’s healing journey. Here are some examples.

1. You’re Stuck With Yourself for Life

As the Confucious saying goes, “Wherever you go, there you are.” You are the one constant companion throughout your life journey. That person that you see every day is the one constant in your life. Your reflection and relationship with yourself is the longest you will have in life. So it makes sense that it’s a good one.

Loving yourself makes that life journey a lot more enjoyable. Would you want to spend a road trip with someone who constantly criticises you? Of course not! So, learning to be kind to yourself, and ideally becoming your own best friend, is essential.

2. Boost Your Confidence

Loving yourself actually builds confidence, which leads to resilience. The energy associated with confidence fuels so much positivity within your mind and body.

When you back yourself, you stretch the boundary of how much life you invest in any given day. You’ll push yourself to achieve. This creates a magnetic hormonal response to want more of that feel-good reward — dopamine.

You can boost confidence by simply appreciating your own worth. This enables you to become your own cheerleader. The more you try and love the experience, the more you want to try and push yourself a little further. This ongoing effort boosts your resilience and generates more courage to continue towards your goals.

By learning to love yourself, you gain confidence. This boosts your capacity to be able to face challenges head-on and believe in your ability to succeed. I am regularly reminding clients of the words of the great philosopher, RuPaul: “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?

3. Improve Your Relationships

Self-love isn’t selfish; it’s essential. In fact, I have deeply contemplated the word selfish. When working with clients, I will deliberately enunciate it in a particular way to emphasize the reference to more SELF. 

Here are some alternatives-

  • Self-ish.
  • Self-ing
  • Self-more
  • Self-ed

Learning to like, and then love yourself sets an unconscious tone for how others should treat you. When you love yourself, you treat yourself with kindness. When you love yourself, you are gentle and kind with your language and self-talk. Your desire to maintain healthy boundaries is strong, and consequently, you often attract positive relationships. There’s even a universal law of attraction that states ‘like attracts like’.

My advice is to learn to like yourself first. There’s an art to it, especially if you’ve become a slave to social media and are addicted to the quick fix of scrolling and comparing yourself to others.

Here’s the thing, when you master the like yourself bit, you’re actually residing within the frequency of love. So learn to love yourself first, and allow yourself to observe how the world can mirror that love back to you.

4. Enhance Your Mental Health

The art of self-love, being willing to like yourself to the point of approval, is a cornerstone for good mental health. Naturally, being kind to yourself, generates more positive energy within your body.

With more physical energy, you are likely to move more, become productive and perhaps even creative. Movement from positive influence reduces stress and anxiety and this boosts your capacity to overcome obstacles that life presents.

The more you invest in you, and work towards loving self, you increase your ability to ride the waves of life. Let’s face it, we all experience ups and downs. How you react to life directly influences your emotional stability and capacity to experience joy. Living with an open heart, and loving yourself increases your capacity for gratitude and receive even more love.

Treating yourself with kindness and compassion enables you to nurture a healthier, more balanced mind. In turn, a calm mind contributes to a calm nervous system.

5. Unleash Your Full Potential

When you learn to believe in yourself, you open yourself up to your hidden treasures. I’m talking about learning and embracing those traits that make you unique and ultimately define what you’re really worth.

Something magical happens when you can embrace your true essence. You develop a hunger to shine that more to the outside world. Ultimately, you’ll come to learn that this is your life purpose -to share your true essence with the world.

Living from this intentional space, from a place of loving self, you naturally become more inclined to pursue your dreams. And those dreams don’t include a million dollars, because you will only manifest a million bucks’ worth of bills.

Those dreams should include a life filled with joyful laughter. And so I ask you this — what would life be like if I could always find something to laugh with? Or make me smile?

Conclusion

Love really is everything. Self-love can and should be your emotional foundation upon which all other forms of love flourish. By embracing your worth, celebrating your uniqueness, and practicing self-compassion, you can create a life filled with joy, confidence, and fulfillment. 

So I invite you to love yourself fiercely and then watch as your world transforms in beautiful ways.

After all, as the Beatles so wisely sang, “All you need is love” — especially the love you give yourself.

Want to read more like this?

This is My Roarsigned copies of my first published book can be purchased from this website.

Self Reflection – A little Look Withinclick here

8 Hot Tips How To Journal – click here

Can You Risk Not Stepping Up To Mother yourself?Click here

About Karen

Change Facilitator

Karen Humphries is a Behavioural Change Facilitator — Mental Health Counsellor, Kinesiology Practitioner + Business Mentor, Intuitive Meditation Facilitator, Clinical Hypnotherapist, Wellness Coach, and Clinical Resource Therapist. She is a published author. She is a self-confessed laughaholic and loves being of service to the world with her humorous and positive approach to life, encouraging people to ‘choose to change and bloom from within.’

Karen Humphries, Change Chick, Change Facilitator, Kinesiology, Wellness Coach, Australian Bush Flower Essences, LEAP Facilitator, Trauma, Public Speaker, Cancer Ambassador, Blooming From Within, Traralgon, Victoria, Gippsland

What Lights You Up

What Lights You Up

Discover what generates the feels and do more of it!

What I love most about the Winter Solstice, the shortest day of light of the year? Regardless of your beliefs, your human nature wants you to go full cave mode, and submit to the slumber of the night.

Winter Solstice is a time to go deep within your heart and create a meaningful connection with yourself. It’s a time of reflection, to connect with the sensory experiences of life and discern what is meaningful.

I liken the Winter Solstice to entering the initial darkness of your heart. But if you allow your imagination to activate, you can envisage a light, your heart spark, to ignite and illuminate this sacred space. 

If visualisation is challenging for you, I recommend connection to the sensations felt within your body. Whether it be tension or relaxation, allow yourself to observe what you are experiencing. And in this moment, of quiet stillness, allow yourself to reflect on the previous six months using the tips below.

Reflection of our journey path affords us the gift of responsibility, to discern what works and what needs attention. Remember there is no right or wrong.

Moving forward, supercharge your observation skills. Observe when your sensory response lights up to something in life. For example, what makes you feel good? Do more of that. 

For me personally, I adore those fleeting moments when the dawn peeks over the horizon and the beams of orange light chase each other over the earth. The night sky changes from black to blue and then the hues of pink and orange arrive. 

That moment when those orange beams reach me, I feel electrically supercharged. I become hyper-aware of everything around me. My senses are stimulated. I purposefully breathe deeply and slowly, savouring these fleeting moments. I meditate, often walking in nature, and allow myself to be intentional as I connect with my dream life whilst moving my body. 

We aren’t genies who can click our fingers and our dream life magically appears before us. We can decide to run a marathon, put on a pair of sneakers, and then run 42 kilometres. Life doesn’t work that way. But with meditation, you can imagine the life you want and create the feel-good energy of that dream.

Here are five ways to actively use meditation to discover what lights you up!

1. Intention

Through my walking meditations, I connect with my intention of the dream life I want to live. I want to feel balanced, calm and peaceful so I must envisage myself flowing from one task to another within the juggle of life. 

2. Habits

Whilst walking, I can activate my imagination. Whilst being meditative I can allow myself to see the bigger picture of my dream life. I can envisage my future where I have fully integrated the positive habits required to support me in achieving my dream life.

By regularly visiting the vision of the ultimate habit(s), I can discern small positive actions that step me towards the final desired outcome. I can then choose, to implement those actions and practice being joyful, happy, peaceful and calm.

3. Strengths

Your imagination is a powerful tool. When you activate your meditative, or dreaming state, and connect with your intentional habits, you can identify what feels natural. These are your strengths. In other words, that feeling is evidence that you already have the tools and strategies developed for achieving what you want.

When looking at the bigger dream life goal, your opportunities for further improvement (some call this your weaknesses) may reveal themself. Never judge this as a failure. Consider this your homework for improvement to achieve your desired goals.

4. See the steps

As you’re walking, allow yourself to see yourself taking those positive steps forward. Envision the actions required to create the new habit to support our dream life. You can experience joy in its most simplistic form during nature walks because you’re in a meditative (or relaxed) state. Each step transposes your physical reality of moving forward, with the imagined desired outcome.

Remember your brain doesn’t know what is real or imagined. You’re in control of that. So double up on the action with imagination to supercharge feeling good.

5. Reflection

The winter solstice day of darkness naturally affords you the time and space to reflect on your perception of success. You get to ask yourself-

  • Have you made positive progress steps towards your goals? 
  • What has hindered your progress? 
  • What might be next to stretch yourself out of your comfort zone?

There’s no right or wrong question as long as you don’t experience shame, blame or guilt for not having arrived fully at the dream. 

Remember always, happiness is fleeting, just like those orange beams of dawn light. Your role in life is to experience as much happiness as you can.

So perhaps your reflection questions may include — where or when do I make time to be, find or experience happiness? Maybe your dream life isn’t to win a million dollars, but to laugh more with your kids.

Conclusion

You can intentionally harness moments of time whilst in nature, that amplify your energetic access to your dream life. You can be intentional in your connection to that dream, and proactive insert small moments of joy seeking to generate that feel-good sensation. And you can actively seek more and more moments of joy-filled wonder in your life until you realise, you are already living your dream. Happy winter solstice!

First published with Illumination, a Medium Publication. 

Want to read more like this?

This is My Roarsigned copies of my first published book can be purchased from this website. Self Reflection – A little Look Withinclick here 8 Hot Tips How To Journal – click here Can You Risk Not Stepping Up To Mother yourself?Click here

About Karen

Change Facilitator

Karen Humphries is a Kinesiology Practitioner, Clinical Resource Therapist, Clinical Hypnotherapist (including psychotherapy), Health & Business Coach, LEAP & NES Practitioner, Intuitive Meditation Facilitator, Training Counsellor, and published author. She is a self-confessed laughaholic.  She loves being of service to the world with her humorous and positive approach to life, encouraging people to ‘choose to change and bloom from within.’ 

Karen Humphries, Change Chick, Change Facilitator, Kinesiology, Wellness Coach, Australian Bush Flower Essences, LEAP Facilitator, Trauma, Public Speaker, Cancer Ambassador, Blooming From Within, Traralgon, Victoria, Gippsland
Why Lasso The Moon

Why Lasso The Moon

10 Coaching Questions To Illuminate Your Life

Regardless of your belief system or spirituality, you don’t need to howl at the moon to gain a benefit. You might even think the rising sun each day has no influence on you — and that’s ok. What you may not realise is that the full moon can illuminate aspects of your life!

Every full moon gifts us the chance to embrace opposition energies — the sun and the moon.

Opposition is like a pot-stirring, or the kettle beginning to bubble and boil. This results in an internal tension that is simply a reflection of your external environment.

What do we feel when we experience tension?

Hands up if you’re ticking any of the following in the feels department:

  • impatient
  • cranky
  • fatigue
  • sleeplessness

During a full moon, you may experience an internal restlessness within yourself which can bring about a myriad of emotions. 

There is one key thing to note when working with the opposition energy of a full moon. You have to surrender to the fight that often ensues when exploring yourself. 

You have to allow yourself to see the bigger picture and gather all the nuances of information and insight. To do this, you need light to illuminate what has been hidden.

When we pause and allow our observation skills to see our true reality, we are gifting ourselves the chance to realise what we may have been resisting or hanging onto.

What we resist persists. 

So the lunar gift of opposition energy heightens the feelings centre, to enable you to acknowledge where and what could be released from within your world.

We can utilise the light of a full moon to illuminate more of ourselves. We can deep dive, reflect and explore where there may be opposition in our life. This reflection may identify a key, open a door, or permit you to make tiny changes to achieve the life you want.

Here are ten questions to enlighten your journaling reflection on life right now.

Choose the first question that resonates for you and deep dive into your heart for the answers to arrive.

  1. How can you best use your energy to be productive?

2. What might you need to do more/less to receive healing energy?

3. How and when can you practice self-care?

4. How can you stay focussed and grounded?

5. How can you remain positive to achieve the outcome you want?

6. How can you nudge or buffer the edges of your comfort zone to allow expansion?

7. How can you best navigate confrontation?

8. What do you need to make peace with your past? Can you now let that old story go?

9. How can you best remain open to welcoming new beginnings?

10. What might you require to boost your capacity to trust that life is unfolding divinely?

Remember, there’s no right or wrong answer here. There is only illumination of your truth.

Conclusion

Regardless of your beliefs about the moon, despite your spirituality, what might you learn about your life by utilising the full moon’s opposition energy?

First published with Illumination, a Medium Publication. Click here this piece.

Want to read more like this?

This is My Roarsigned copies of my first published book can be purchased from this website.

Practice The Pause  – click here

5 Ways to Boost Self – click here

About Karen

Change Facilitator

Karen Humphries is a Change Facilitator. She is a qualified Kinesiology Practitioner, Health & Business Coach, LEAP & NES Practitioner, Intuitive Meditation Facilitator, Clinical Hypnotherapist, and published author. She is a self-confessed laughaholic.  She loves being of service to the world with her humorous and positive approach to life, encouraging people to ‘choose to change and bloom from within.’ 

Karen Humphries, Change Chick, Change Facilitator, Kinesiology, Wellness Coach, Australian Bush Flower Essences, LEAP Facilitator, Trauma, Public Speaker, Cancer Ambassador, Blooming From Within, Traralgon, Victoria, Gippsland